You have me take a boatload of courses and teach over the summer for the sole purpose of being able to give you an executive summary.’ It was tongue in cheek, but there was also a measure of seriousness in her accusation. Well, I had one freaking semester to figure out what I wanted to do and learn everything I could. I would take any help and any shortcut I could. Don’t get me wrong. I liked Jen and enjoyed spending time with her. But, I had set my eyes on a goal and I was damn well going to accomplish it if I could ever figure out what it was. I spent time with Sunny over the break as well. I liked her and she was fun to talk with. I asked her to help me figure out what to do. She wanted to know what I wanted to accomplish. ‘What is it you want from a job? For example, I know how much you enjoy finding just the right presents for people. In fact, I don’t know that I’ve seen anyone better at it. If your goal is to be able to work to make people happy there are a lot of things you. ‘Shh, it’s okay, sweetie, it’s okay,’ she said, seeing me upset. She took my head in her hands and held it. ‘Look at me,’ she said, gently. I tried to avoid her gaze, my face wet as the salt water ran down my cheeks. ‘Please, look at me.’ Reluctantly, I looked at her sweet, beautiful face through my wet eyes. ‘I love you, you know that. And I know that I love you as Carl and as Carla, because to me they’re the same person. They’re you, and that’s who I love. If you want to call the whole thing off, go back to being Carl, that’s fine, I won’t mind at all. But baby, honestly, I’ve seen how different you are now, and I love having Carla in my life, and I really think that you do to. In the end, it’s up to you, you’ll have to make the decision whether Carla stays or goes. If you want to go home right now and stop being Carla, that’s okay, I really don’t mind. Just look at it as something that’s been fun and we’ve both enjoyed, and then we’ll put it behind us. All right?’ She looked deep.
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